One evening, my sons called "Mom, Mom! Come quick!" and there, nestled into our front landscape bed, was a newly born fawn. It melted my heart to hear my 8 and 11 year olds expressing great concern. The innocence of this moment touched their hearts. "Do you think its mom is nearby?" they asked. "Can we check on him in the morning?" they asked. And we did.
But, in the meantime, I consulted one of my favorite reads, Medicine Cards by Jamie Sams and David Carson. Their book shares a poem, and a mythic tale of each animal's "medicine"--the gifts gracing each animal and hence gracing us by their visit.
What I read about fawn inspired me to soften my own heart even more deeply, to discover and melt even more spaces and places within. I'll share my retelling, with credit to Jamie and David. . .
One day fawn heard Great Spirit calling her to connect on Sacred Mountain, so she began journeying up the mountain. But, midway up the mountain there lived a horrifying monster, with three heads streaming fire, larger than a skyscraper and roaring an ear-piercing scream at the top of its lungs.
This monster believed it acquired power by disconnecting creatures from Great Spirit, and such appeared to be true. The monster was so terrifying that most creatures dropped dead upon sight of it.
But not fawn. Fawn walked straight up to the monster and said, "Excuse me, sir, please let me pass. I need to go connect with Great Spirit."
The monster didn't know what to do?
No one ever had spoken to it with such soft, strong and clear kindness. No one had ever asked to pass. No one had ever dared to face it head on.
So, the monster looked at the fawn, and roared louder.
But fawn stood there, without a drop of fear in her heart, for she knew that the monster wasn't real. She stood there, pouring love through her eyes.
The monster breathed smoke all around fawn.
She stood still, waiting for it to clear, knowing it, too, was illusion.
Finally, the monster looked down at fawn, and saw her eyes. She stood there loving him so effusively, that he couldn't help but receive it.
In that moment, all the hardened places in the monster's heart began to melt into a liquified pool and its body shrunk to the size of a walnut, and fawn walked right past and up, up, up to the top of the mountain, to connect with Great Spirit. She chose love, and it melted even the most hardened of hearts.
When we first hear this story, our first imaginings may be to look lovingly at people and situations that feel like monsters in our lives, and pour loving thoughts towards these. Perhaps we'd like to melt what feel like external obstacles to connection. However, if we sit a little longer, we begin to realize that those outer monsters are mere projections of our inner realities.
What if our first monsters are those within the hardened places of our own hearts?
Where are the places where we're almost nice to ourselves, but not quite?
Where are the places where we're still weaving falsehoods that we're not enough?
What might the deeper truth be? What might be more true?
How might we bring the gentility of fawn medicine to melt our own hearts even more?
This is the work. To fall even more deeply in love with the Self, and bring our authenticity to one another through relationship. What if, it's through this path, that we become better equipped to weather global changes.
In deep love and gratitude,
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